Sometimes, if you’re patient enough as a parent, things come full circle. I’ve always been wary of parents who before their “li’l slugger†can even walk have his glove oiled and his baseball jersey washed and ironed. We all want to share our passions with our kids; we wouldn’t be human if that weren’t the case. But force-feeding children those passions, there’s nothing pretty about that.
My kids know that there are two things I love beyond all reason (besides them, of course): coffee and classical music. The coffee, well…I wouldn’t want them to try it; they’ll be loading up on caffeine soon enough, and it won’t be with my blessing. And the classical music? They’ve never been impressed. In the car, when I’m blissing out to Bach or Beethoven, they’re generally grousing, whining, “Mommy, can you listen to something else? Something besides the classics?â€
At three or so, Ben coined the term “the classics†for classical music, and it’s stuck. I, for one, like it. So I haven’t bothered to correct him, and now Jack’s picked it up as well. What the boys have also picked up, unwittingly, is an unerring sense of what instrument produces which kind of sound. They like to play “name that instrument†in the car, even if they are being forced to listen to such terrible music.
Terrible? Well, Ben thought so until recently. Until yesterday, as a matter of fact, when he was doing homework at the kitchen table, and I was starting to make dinner in the company of the spunky and rather mischievous Lily Allen. “Mom,†Ben scowled. “This music is too loud. I can’t concentrate.â€
“Oh! I don’t mind turning it down,†I replied. Anything in the service of homework. But he protested. “No, no! I want music. How about your classics?â€
I think I stared, so dumbfounded was I. Once I’d gathered my wits, I rushed to start up some Mozart violin sonatas before he changed his mind. Then I grinned — a silly, giddy grin.
I’m still grinning today.
What are your passions? And are you sharing them with your kids? If so, how have they reacted?
[tags]kids, children, parents, parenting, teaching, music, classical, romantic, baroque, orchestral, coffee[/tags]
Photo graciously provided by bullish1974, through a Creative Commons license, some rights reserved
15 responses so far ↓
InTheFastLane // Jan 31, 2008 at 12:54 pm
Reading is one of my passions and it has proved to be an easy one to get my kids hooked on. Both my older two are great and passionate readers. My youngest loves books and I think he will catch on too.
Another passion of mine is running. It has been a little more difficult to pass on this love, but all my kids love being active, whether it is sports or hiking or just enjoying being outside. And maybe one of them will eventually choose to run. But, I do want to make sure it is their choice and not something they are doing because they are “expected” to.
Lori // Jan 31, 2008 at 1:02 pm
I think this is great because it is a reminder that sometimes passions, or even just appreciation, take time to grow.
I adore reading, have surrounded my children with books, and read to them constantly when they were young. As of yet, they have not caught the fever but I still have hope.
I would have to say that one of my other passions is simply home and family. I think they get that one.
Emily // Jan 31, 2008 at 1:53 pm
Um, it goes the other way around here. Tonight? “Let’s listen to violins!”
Dude. My kids are, like, way more cultured than I am.
MamaGeek // Jan 31, 2008 at 2:04 pm
The classics over Lily Allen? I think Bach is rolling over right about now.
My son is way too young to pursue my green passions at the moment. But by 18 months, who knows, he may prove me wrong and save a rain forest or two.
Slow Panic // Jan 31, 2008 at 2:09 pm
I’m having a hard time getting my kids to love reading on their own, but I’m still hoping.
A.L. Hatch // Jan 31, 2008 at 2:26 pm
Music is a big deal around here, too. Considering my husband is getting his doctorate in music education, there is strong desire for our daughter to be musical. We try not to shove it at her; instead we just sing a lot and we play lots of music for her.
She sings to herself all day long, so I guess it is working.
I hope The Poo finds her own passion - if it happens to reflect mine or her father’s, great. If not, I look forward to seeing what she teaches me.
Great post, and Lily Allen rocks.
Maddy // Jan 31, 2008 at 2:47 pm
Passions? I don’t think I have any of those left.
Reading - bit of a non-starter around here.
Cooking - ditto
Pottery and clay - too mucky for one and the opposite for the other.
Their passion? Pokemons - do I share? I try but it’s really, really hard to be convincingly enthusiastic.
Cheers
chaotic joy // Jan 31, 2008 at 4:27 pm
I know you know that my daughter Allison shares my own childhood dream of making it to Broadway. It makes my heart soar to be so fortunate as to actually have birthed a child that shares one of my passions.
My other? Well, I was the nerdiest kind of bookworm as a child. I carried books with me everywhere, at recess, on the bus, and hid under the covers with a flashlight night after night. My own children are iffy on books. They tolerate them, like them if they catch their interest, but it’s definitely not a passion. I still have two to go though. Maybe Ben or Clara will be like me in this way.
Caryn // Jan 31, 2008 at 6:04 pm
Wow. That’s really cool! Many children end up picking up political views, reading habits (or lack thereof), language, gestures, etc. from their parents. I suppose it’s only fitting that occasionally music can rub off, too.
HRH // Jan 31, 2008 at 7:01 pm
The boys have easily taken to golf, playing cards and being read to. Reading on their own may take a little more non-pushing time.
Monica // Jan 31, 2008 at 8:24 pm
Well Andy turns four months tomorrow, so it is hard to tell if he enjoys it, but I love to watch sports with him. I love sports. I’ve always had a masculine energy. I think he likes it. But I certainly agree about not forcing your kids to do things that you want to do.
McSwain // Jan 31, 2008 at 8:38 pm
Reading the classics. The Boy is reading Tom Sawyer right now.
Also music and gourmet food. He loves all of them, and I refuse to buy into the kids won’t eat good foods that are good to them thing. Kids form a lot of opinions based on what they think they’re supposed to like.
Mary Joan // Feb 1, 2008 at 7:26 am
Reading and classical music and Bob Dylan are passions I have shared with my kids and now my grandson. Unlike his mom and aunts, almost 9-month-old Michael is more interested in chewing books and ripping pages than listening to stories. I can only read to him when he is imprisoned in his high chair or when I am sitting in a chair, holding the book nursery school style, and he is on the floor.
Dylan has been entirely successful, classical music not so much with my 4 girls. However, Michael loves classical music. My husband regularly sings Schubert Lieder to him and he loves to listen to lieder on CD. He will actually stop what he is doing and sit and listen. The Nutcracker is another favorite. Mozart symphonies are also a big success.
wyo // Feb 2, 2008 at 5:55 pm
Learning, I would say, is my greatest passion. It’s also a helluva challenge sometimes. Little Girl loves learning when it comes easily to her, but challenges are not welcome. I guess this means I’ve been successful at passing passions AND biases to her, which is at least half decent. :\
Reading has come slowly to her, but she loves to tell a story. She does not enjoy math much, but she’s quite good at it. And as far as music goes, well, my passions there are extremely strong, but rarely shared. She tolerates much of my metal, however, and actively enjoys most any music with a “girl singer.” (Excepting groups like Arch Enemy, in which it’s pretty much impossible to tell the gender of the lead screamer.
Blooming Desertpea // Feb 5, 2008 at 1:36 pm
I had one of those “Wow”-moments about a week ago. It wasn’t really about one of my passions. It was about my boy and reading in general. He’s never been the reading geek like my daughter, so, she and I have been telling him for year nearly that “Harry Potter”-books are way way more exciting than the DVDs - I’ve only given him the chance to watch the first two. He didn’t buy it and continued to bug me about watching the others. So, I baited him: If you read the third book, I will allow you to watch the corresponding video. He didn’t bite. But last week he’s been reading and reading and reading and was extremly excited about continuing that he would have skipped dinner for it … What do you know!
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